Every person who has ever owned a vibrator (before the fancy-pants rechargeable kind), knows the struggle of batteries slowly dying over time. This can take weeks depending on your frequency of use, so the worst part is that the change is so undetectable that you barely notice it happening until one day, you “could swear this thing used to feel better.” Hopefully you’re fortunate enough to not only have new batteries somewhere, but to have the proper size for your device. If you do, there is nothing compared to the first time you switch that bugger on and remember what you’ve been missing.
Recently, I’ve discovered that the “clean screen” event is similar to “New Vibrator Battery Day.” For my non-stoner friends, a screen is what you would use in your pipe or bong to hold and filter the weed so you don’t inhale it, among other uses.
Resin is a byproduct formed by combustion of marijuana using a flame or other extreme heat source, which represents itself as a black, viscous liquid that hardens when cool. It acts almost like glue that cements in the mesh of the screen, so you can understand why trying to smoke through it can be nearly impossible. You have to suck that thing like it’s your job. What is referred to as “clean screen” is when you replace or clean the screen after it has gotten clogged and “gunked” up from resin after some time. So when someone hands you a pipe and says, “Clean screen,” they’re warning you, so don’t vacuum that shit or you’re gonna be hurting.
So I find that the satisfaction of replacing a screen after days of sucking so hard my neck hurts, (that sounds naughty?), is just as satisfying as it used to be to replace my vibrator batteries. This of course was back in the prehistoric times of sex toys before rechargeables and corded toys like my beloved Magic Wand Original. If you don’t have one yet, I CANNOT URGE YOU MORE VEHEMENTLY to buy one. If the rechargeable isn’t in the budget, the Original is all you need. Good Vibrations is a partner of mine, and I can’t recommend them enough for price, product, and customer service. I’ve bought from them plenty of times!
What are your clean screen and New Battery Day stories?
I love clean Cardenas. There only challenge is that I with a nice, fresh screen, I sometimes sometimes take such a HUGE hit I end up coughing half of it out before I can blower it into my loving wife’s mouth. I guess it is possible to have too much of even so good a thing as weed.
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I nominate you for the Liebster-award! Follow this link so you can make your own post and answer my questions. https://benjibabeldom.wordpress.com/2015/09/26/liebster-award-nomination/
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I think I’m enjoying the banter as much as the post! ❤
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I remember the days of stealing the batteries out of my kid’s toys in moments of desperation, and then trying to look all surprised when he asked why his Thomas The Tank Engine wasn’t working. Yeah, I know, bad bad mother.
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LoL Guilty!
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What a great analogy! Love this, love your blog! Hope this is the best day of your life!
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Aw, thank you! Same to you, love!
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children eating your chocolate stash, the dog eating your underwear, TV remote running out of battery and a dead vibrator…
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That’s a bad day!
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Lol I can remember stealing the screens from the faucets for the pipe. I switched to stones after awhile.. Only thing needed to clean them was a pipe cleaner. Smooth draw and enhanced the flavor (or maybe I was just stoned).. Now I have a job where I can’t smoke anymore.. So those days are just happy memories.
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As far as the batteries.. Hitachi!!! No batteries needed and you can get attachments for internal use also.
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Hell yes, that’s why I promoted it in the post! My favorite. ❤
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Hitachi was my biggest mistake.. I bought one for my ex wife.. With a variety of attachments and I ceased to be useful in her eyes for anything more than a paycheck and to raise the kids. 14 years I kept my love for D/s in check because she thought it was disgusting and disrespectful.. Only to be replaced by a toy.
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Bummer, sorry to hear that. How ironic of her to replace you for a machine, that’s not disgusting and disrespectful?
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She has some issues to say the least. But she gave me two beautiful children that I love with all that I am. Now she is making some other poor sucker miserable.
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Life usually works out that way.
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Ohhh thoughts where have you been my whole life? Lol
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I’m here now, love. There, there.
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Lol funny with a sexy mind!!
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Why, thank you. 😉
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You’re welcome love.
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